After becoming completely overwhelmed with the information I was reading, I took the advice of someone from the forum at poz.com and took a break from reading everything. I had so much else going on that I just couldn't handle it all. That included taking a break from the blog.
My updates are that I talked to NP on Wednesday night. I told him I got tested and was worried about the results and that I would get them back today. I'm going to his place later tonight to share what my results are. He was supportive and said that the decision to bareback was mutual and I wasn't at fault for anything.
Also, I told another friend, NC, about my initial results. DM can't come with me today, so I needed to bring someone else. NC has been really supportive as well and is going to join me today.
I'm now just waiting for the call back from Harlem United with when I can go in for my confirmatory results.
On the flip side of things, I got an email this morning about the job I've been interviewing with. They said they are ready to move forward with an offer, just need to get my references in to them. I started crying when I read that. I feel like there is just so much going on. Very difficult to process this all.